iT's oPeN

Unrequited love

2012-02-09T17:12:00.001-08:00

Can we fall in love without having experienced love with the person?
Is there such a thing as unrequited love?
In the many mistakes that I have made, I have understood even lesser of what love is. I understand it to be this beautiful warm feeling that make's the world a much happier place. The physicality of the word love is so strong that it gives it a tangible aspect to which none can put their finger on but instead can feel their whole body and soul enveloped by it.
As human beings, we are to understand that love is the emotional and physical relationship between two individuals that which is uncontrollable, desirable and plentiful. But how are we to understand the meaning of requited love?
How can one call it love when there is nothing but a vacuum at the other end that sucks the very life out of us? I understand the meaning of unrequited, it is to not reciprocate, to not be given back. So if love is a two way struggle, can we actually classify unrequited love as love?
At my current position of ultimate loss, I stand my ground with my head held high and my heart held tight. It is not love as it is not reciprocated. It is not love as it not a two way dialogue of emotion or physical activity with another person.
It is just desire, the desire to want, to have, to feel this 'love'.
I want it and I will have it, all in due time.

cupid strikes again.. MISFIRE!!!!!

2012-02-05T16:55:00.001-08:00

The past months have been bit of a whirlwind with cupid shooting it's arrow in the wrong direction. But it shot hard and stuck, and now I seem to be back in the same place that I promised myself I would never be. I wonder if I ask for it too much or if i pray for it, that it would come true. Helplessly falling from the highest point into a deep pool of unrequited dreams and love.
I ask for it, I need it, I want it. What is it that makes me different from having it, sharing it?
We do not choose who we love, but we choose to love them unconditionally. It is a crime to compartmentalise your love for a loved one. We cannot barter it and we cannot expect it to prove evident of trust. It does prove however that there is this four letter word that seems to evoke the most complex emotions and induce physical discomfort. How does this concoction of mystery steer our lives into a life for two?
To be unable to tell the person you love them, is the worst feeling ever. You feel it and you want to share it, but what of it?
Are we to imagine that if the answer were to be 'No', the jeopardy we put ourselves in is worth the risk?
Idealist would say, it's better to say it out, tell them and atleast it would an ultimatum. You would know how to respond from thereon. But what if it isn't that easy. What if this relationship is all that matters, would you risk it?
I am a dreamer and I dream. I dream of love, being loved and I dream that one day, I will be able to say the words "I love you too".

Yeah you, got that something
I think you'll understand
When I say that something
I wanna hold your hand, I wanna hold your hand, I wanna hold your hand. - Beatles

cupid strikes again.. MISFIRE!!!!!

2012-02-05T16:55:00.000-08:00

The past months have been bit of a whirlwind with cupid shooting it's arrow in the wrong direction. But it shot hard and stuck, and now I seem to be back in the same place that I promised myself I would never be. I wonder if I ask for it too much or if i pray for it, that it would come true. Helplessly falling from the highest point into a deep pool of unrequited dreams and love.
I ask for it, I need it, I want it. What is it that makes me different from having it, sharing it?
We do not choose who we love, but we choose to love them unconditionally. It is a crime to compartmentalise your love for a loved one. We cannot barter it and we cannot expect it to prove evident of trust. It does prove however that there is this four letter word that seems to evoke the most complex emotions and induce physical discomfort. How does this concoction of mystery steer our lives into a life for two?
To be unable to tell the person you love them, is the worst feeling ever. You feel it and you want to share it, but what of it?
Are we to imagine that if the answer were to be 'No', the jeopardy we put ourselves in is worth the risk?
Idealist would say, it's better to say it out, tell them and atleast it would an ultimatum. You would know how to respond from thereon. But what if it isn't that easy. What if this relationship is all that matters, would you risk it?
I am a dreamer and I dream. I dream of love, being loved and I dream that one day, I will be able to say the words "I love you too".

And when I touch you I feel happy, inside
It's such a feeling that my love,
I can't hide, I can't hide, I can't hide

Yeah you, got that something
I think you'll understand
When I say that something
I wanna hold your hand, I wanna hold your hand, I wanna hold your hand.

To the left...

2012-01-22T18:10:00.000-08:00

Is it ever wrong to cut tracks before the car crashes or whether we see if the car overturns, does a dynamic flip and land on it's tyres like a James Bond movie?
I cant help but think that there are times in life where we do feel the need to be adventurous and experimentation is the only way out, but there is this point in life where I feel one needs to put their foot down and say 'No.' Is it wrong to do so, whether there is another person involved, the emotions that run through or if there are any at all?
I cant help but begin to imagine that we in this world have made ourselves to believe in this sudden departure of selflessness that seem a bit selfish and ego-centric.
A life of a creative is all about experimentation and exposure to the different lives that we tend to lead. Our very livelihood is based on this dynamic process of consumption and the never ending source and human evil of 'need'.
My life has been as hectic and on the threshold of borderline insanity. I love my work and I love the fact that my work allows me to express my emotions and is an important outlet for me to bring myself to sanity. The need to filter the visual and verbal diarrhea from my mind allows me the chance to reflect and view my options before i depart them on some unsuspecting victims.
The time that is allowed to involve another half seems precious and rare. My time away from work is like being without a brain. Mindless, wandering aimlessly to another destination without any knowledge of being. But if the heart were to grow fond of someone, leaving my mind at home would be a lot easier. After all when it comes to the four letter word, do we ever think rationally?
So in all fairness, I am not at fault for wanting what I want. Call it ego-centric or selfish, but in plain observation, I have every right and so does everyone, to a life of their choices and mistakes. That is after all what makes life so interesting.

politely incorrect.

2011-10-06T11:42:00.000-07:00

Mom was here for a couple of weeks, to enjoy the london sun. My mom is one of the most sensitive and giving person I have ever me, yet..sometimes she says the most politically incorrect and awkward things and my response would be "MAA...u cant say that! "
She somehow always manages to surprise me with her naivety and innocence.

New Section!!!- Naughty Nachee

2011-10-05T12:54:00.002-07:00

Hey guys!! So i know it's been long and my updates havent exactly been coming very often, for the few that do visit my blog. But... I am starting a new section in my blog (4Q) which would be an insider's take on upcoming and inspiring people/designers that I like.

So if you have any feedback, lay it down.

For my first interview section, we have Nachiket Barve, a very established and promising fashion designer from India. After graduating from The National Institute of Design, Nachiket made a mark in his field by creating colourful palates of dreamy dresses and embroidered ensemble that took India by storm. One of his many clientele's include the Royal family of Bollywood, The Bachchans and many more. Take a look at his work here

http://www.nachiketbarvedesign.com/default.htm

How old do u think you look?
24 on some days 38 on some!

Size 0?
wish i could take the many 0s on my size! over-hyped concept!

Last project u worked on...
Tanishq ad with Jaya and Amitabh Bachchan for their Diwali Ad. Styled and did costumes

What made u smile today?
Looking at my diary written at Everest Base Camp, seeing my dogs eyes, seeing an old photo from NID.

Thanks naughty nachee!!! *dont kill me for giving out ur pet name :p

All images copyright to Nachiket Barve Designs.

Stop attitud-ing me...

2011-10-04T16:04:00.000-07:00

bzzz.

2011-08-22T18:03:00.000-07:00

a bee kissed me today..and then flew away

Happy birthday to me!

2011-08-21T20:29:00.000-07:00

I'v turned a year older and i'am not sure if i believe in the saying, with age comes wisdom. I think in my case wisdom was only a couple of teeth that never seemed to grow. I graduated, i partied hard, i made new friends and i think i began to love and loose again.
Life is but bizarre and it never ceases to astonish me, the amount of bullshit we put ourselves through. We believe in this ideal world where if we work hard for the right things, they will come to us. I don't know.. i really don't.
I am half way through my life and it seems to me that life is just a freak show of how bizarre one's life and the choices one makes, invariably point out to the direction of absolute monotony of deviant bliss that self infatuates the strongest as well as the weakest amongst us. It perpetuates this malnutrition of godly facts that bear no resemblance to life as it is. It stand's beyond it's ground and takes a peak into the little lives we lead and the crap that get's thrown at us.
This is in no way a hate mail nor a 'i hate my life' post. I love my life and i love the people in it. The only problem is..that i don't like myself.
How many times have you asked yourself this question. Do you like yourself? Do you like who you have become?
In todays world or should i say generation, how many of us have actually walked over someone to get ahead or just feel good about ourselves? In front of them or even behind their backs. I have, and i am not proud of it. But at the same time i feel the justification of it seems to prolong this sense of desire to have the 'need' of this so called achievement in life whether at work or at play, while the doctor's away tugging at lil johnny's balls.
Lil Johnny can play all he want, jut make sure he does not play in my backyard.
My age seems to be a problem and at the same time, a bonus of immeasurable freedom and choices to do whatsoever i choose to do no matter the damages after. Where did i, at one point begin to digress into an immobile state of immaturity which i find hard to break out off. These moments of bizarre happenings only seem to remind me that i am old, old enough to get married, to be a father, or an uncle, or a boyfriend or someone's bitch...
It all seems familiar now, this was a boy that was lost, a boy who believed in mermaids and that people could fly..
I am not that boy anymore, but a blurry reflection of that bright boy that always exchanged his friends lunch for his own. After all he was never happy with what he got.

"Tie me up bitch and i will make your world go round!! "

Lil ole' me!!

2011-01-21T14:40:00.000-08:00

So here's the interview and the 6 page spread they did which i am absolutely thrilled about!! yay!! I hope you guys like it and if you do, you have to check out Inspire Magazine..They are GOOD!!

Big thanks to Petra, Andrej for thinking iam 'strange'. :p and to Nika!!

All images copyright : Inspire Magazine

Finally got the copy!!! woohoooo!!!

INSPIRE...

2011-01-08T10:10:00.002-08:00

So here's a sneak peak into the litte article INSPIRE magazine did on lil ole' me. The magazine quite literally takes on its own words and showcases art and design in many ways than one. I would highly recommend it (even though its in slovakian..yep that's right!!) and its editorials are definitely at par and competing with the Vogue's and the ID's.

Also if you get your hands on this issue, definitely check out the 'Street Art Communication' article in this issue for some sick images!!

The whole interview will be up shortly.

Kudos to Nika for producing such amazing material every couple of months!! yay!

All images copyright: INSPIRE 'magazine with a difference', 2011

Life

2010-12-29T10:43:00.001-08:00

You know i began to think that life was all about work and nothing else and about accomplishing one's goals and henceforth. But, is it really?

My life is London has taught me to fend for myself and believe in no one else but myself, to depend on myself. It has brought out a very strong, confident an vicious side of me which at times surprises me and at the same time scares me as well. I try to be as jaded when it comes to work and everything that surrounds work which for me is my life in London, but somehow i seemed to have lost the bigger picture.

During these holidays, i have realised that the reason i work myself to death most of the times is to in some way distract myself from the frivolous play of emotions and trans-relations which i used to feel were close to insignificant when in comparison to work. I made myself believe that work is the end all and it all of my life and it should be. I begin to question that theory...

I love my work and i love the drive it has given me, but at the same time i hate the fact that work somehow seems to have displaced my importance at home and my relationships which i hold so dearly, a bit astray. I do not mean to complain and i do not regret but i am aware of the consequence now.

My loved ones are too important for me to push aside and my relationships are too crucial for me to ignore them. I do not mean to forget work or to give it a kick in the back but i think the trick would be to compartmentalise work along with life. Life people.. life is what it is. What is life if you do not have someone to share it with?

I have shared my many birthdays with my mother and my brother who have loved me dearly.

I have shared many conversations with friends whom i never wish to loose.

I have had many dogs that i have fed and play with,

and i have work that i love which makes me whole.

This is life, not just work, not just family. It is everything!

So if someone says they have no time for family, friends or dont believe in holiday's...they're life is as interesting as a stick of hay.

Take a break and enjoy life, we only have one!!!

ps- I love you hanumant and gaurav!!!! :')

Maria Lani

2010-12-16T22:53:00.001-08:00

A project i had worked on for John Galliano. I t was based on this enigma called Maria Lani who was this Czech or Hungarian born actress who took the Paris art world by storm. This is a short excerpt about Maria Lani.

"In the late 1920's, an actress (German, Polish, or Czech depending on the source) named Maria Lani arrived on the Paris art scene. Over the next two years she convinced over 50 artists to paint her portrait on the pretext that they would be used in a horror movie in which she was starring about painting that come to life. In November 1930, the paintings were exhibited at gallery and a catalog of the exhibition was created which included an introduction by Jean Cocteau part of which reads: "Every time I look away she changes... what a hypnotic force the woman has."

The only problem was Lani was a stenographer from Prague (or Warsaw), not an actress and there was no movie. Lani took all the painting that didn't sell at the exhibition and fled to America where many more were sold. By wartime, Lani worked at the Stage Door Canteen in New York, a sort of dance hall for servicemen on leave where they could be entertained by celebrities. After the war she returned to Paris where she died in 1954.

A collection of the images made by the likes of Matisse, Cocteau, & Chagall can be viewed in LIFE. The article is from the war years and in part details her life at the Stage Door Canteen."

My concept was based on the deterioration of Maria Lani and how important the artwork based on her were as it were for Dorian Grey. Without her artwork, she would unknown and her life be just another chapter in the world that goes by.

Model-Priyanka
Make up-Kenny
Photography-Jeff Hahn

DONE.

2010-12-03T14:56:00.000-08:00

I am angry, pissed off and a whole lotta other things.
Nothing is as it should be, nothing is as i want it to be and nothing is ever what i would like it to be.

Enough of giving and enough of being there for someone.
This is a pure hate post which i need to feel and vent.

Life and work is stagnant and i cannot seem to progress...it frustrates me.. and i feel i have given more than received.
Call me a romantic of my work but in all, I am done.

No more.. Absolutely no more of giving.

This is the end.

Lesson learnt.

tea party and a bad poem

2010-11-30T00:19:00.000-08:00

Around the table they sat,
A rabbit with a hat.
Pouring whiskey into tea,
Turning it into a parchiee !!

They held their drinks,
Mighty as they stand,
But fell over all,
For none could stand...
From the drink in their hand.

long, gone and moved on...

2010-11-25T18:20:00.001-08:00

...

dandies...

2010-11-25T06:47:00.004-08:00

Hey, so this is some work from last year that i completely forgot i had. Anyway it was a group project and i had a lot of fun. The project took inspiration from the Dandies and their lifestyle with us turning the dandies into cravat loving beautiful wo-'men'.

Models: Nina, Anna-mi

Make-up & Hair: Kelsang, Leena, Mathilde

Photography: Kelsang

tick tock..

2010-11-17T05:21:00.001-08:00

Conversations with a father...

2010-11-09T20:26:00.004-08:00

K Leckdup Dongsar... That was my father's name. He was 46 when he passed away. He was an amazing man, a man whom i wish i knew better.

My father was a very warm person who always put other people before him. He loved my mother and worshiped her. He doted on my brother and was always his favourite without a question of a doubt. My brother followed my father everywhere, to his factory, his office, his client meetings..everywhere. I was more of a mother's son but at the same time, there was never a time where i did not feel the urge to prove my worthiness to my father which mostly ended up in relentless laughter at the dinner table ( at least i made them smile).

Bro, Mom, Dad and dad's friend

My father left us at the age of 9 when i just began to understand what puberty was and where babies came from (something my mother would like to forget..). It was a traumatic year for us but what surprised me was that i never saw the cracks in my parents marriage or maybe i was too young to even understand or comprehend what was happening.
We saw him twice between the age of 9-13. The awkward hello's would be greeted with the tearful goodbye's of innocence and memories that made everything alright. It made everything feel normal for those few seconds that we were in his arms, it made it alright for us to love him again.

My father passed away before i could say my goodbyes (i was 13). I never got to tell him how much i loved him and how sorry i was for telling him that he was dead to me. As a child at the tender age of 10, what does one comprehend when one is asked to tell their parent that they are dead to them. Does the child really understand the battle of words and the hurtful exchanges that would affect everyone within the conversation.

I dreamt of my father a couple of nights back.He was as real as the touch of the cold irish breeze. I spoke to him, i remember everything i said to him. I remember telling him of what we did in school later on, or about how Tseten (my brother) has gotten so fat, about mom missing him and how we do not talk about him at all.
I told him i was angry at him for not having seen us, and i was angry that he wasn't there for my graduation, nor for my first fashion show or my frist prize in school for painting.
I was angry that i havent said the word "DAD" and not have got a response from it.
I was angry that i could not remember his voice...
But i was angry because i loved him and i missed him terribly.
He said he knew and he was sorry but that he was watching us grow up and couldn't be happier.
Suddenly he began to fade, he had to go. I refused and desperation got me to hold onto his hand for dear life. I asked him why he had to leave.
He said " because your waking up...but i love you." and i woke up. I woke up crying, my eyes swollen from the ordeal that i seemed to have carried for the past sixteen odd years in my life.

This dream wasn't a dream, it was real. Many may contest that but who am i to convince them.
Iam just a son who wishes to speak to his father again.

...

a day in the life of the unwell

2010-10-24T18:55:00.000-07:00

Taking into account...

how i hate being unwell...

i put on my magic hat

and get lost in time...

taken away by hunger for knowledge...

i fall back...

to retire to my never ending quest for bliss.

.

...

2010-10-24T11:57:00.000-07:00

Piazza Porto di Repetta, Ara Pacis, Rome

...

mIm

2010-10-22T18:37:00.001-07:00

You know what, you may think that you know whats happening around you and concerning the people around you...NOT ! If there's one thing in life that i am sure of is that one can never be fully aware of the things around you. There is only so much one can understand from observing, the rest is all about co-incidence and what this brings and puts forth in front of your feet.
We believe ourselves to be in control of our life and our emotions but we all know how hard it is to manage our emotions. We do not ask to fall into a hole filled with emotions where judgment and a blindfold go hand in hand.
If there is one thing i have learnt or am still learning is that no one is more special in this world than yourself! Treat yourself with kindness you would treat the love of your life with. Treat yourself with happiness and with materials goods as well. There is nothing wrong with that!
The words I, ME and MYSELF are not just words taken out of a dictionary, there are words that represent you and who you are.
Use these words freely and scream it out if you must. There is nothing wrong in this.
Depend on no one but yourself, you are who you make yourself to be and your are what you make yourself from this point to be.
The ego is there for a reason, not just to pamper our insatiable desire to be acknowledged for our individuality but more so to pick us up from a dark place that could suck the life out of us.
So pick yourself up and kick yourself in the ass if you havent already! You deserve it!!
Go feed your ego!
And if anyone says anything, tell them to..

MONEY

2010-10-18T16:09:00.000-07:00

The past couple of weeks havent exactly been smooth sailing but for all it's worth, iam glad that i went through it. It saddens me to think how crucial money is in our life and how it handicaps every aspect within our life whether emotional, creative or even physical. It take's the breathe out of me knowing that no matter how many amazing ideas we have, if you do not have the basic means to translate your ideas to these tangible mediums, it breaks us...it breaks every bone within my body and makes me feel incomplete.
I try to believe that we as designers are problem solvers, but what does one do when the problem is us?
This mental breakdown begins to run our minds into a revolving door that just dosent seem to lead to any road but a repertoire of silent noise which can breaks even the strongest of us.
There is always a solution i tell others, so remind myself i did. I refuse to let these monetary devils overtake my sanity and with every step i push harder and i scream at the top of my lungs. I scream for space, i scream for love, i scream for success!!
I am but human and so is everyone else, so where does this sudden herculean urge to beat the crap out of 'this' situation arise from. Is it from the memories of lying down and taking crap as a kid from an older sibling or the memories of our unsatisfied upbringing that we feel the need to get out off?
I have realised that it isn't all about me. It is also from my surroundings and by that i mean my family and my friends. No matter how deep we dig our graves, they always seem to somehow magically turn into the priesthood and bless us and remind us of what we are worth.
I wish there would be a day that money would be a thing of the past but i cannot. It is crucial as it is frivolous but one cannot deny the importance of its power. Combine money with power + family + friends and you have = success.

FAMILY = check!
FRIENDS = check!
MONEY = coming soon !!!

NOTE: To you, you know who you are...thank you!! x

_

2010-10-11T11:55:00.000-07:00

Hold on tight,
And we shall swim across the sea of light
To a place where no one has been
No one has seen
A place for just you and me.

Bind my heart and keep it in place,
Let it fall upon your grace.

Loose me once and i shall fall,
Deep in sleep...
Never to wake up from this nightmarish sleep.

Hold me tight
Take every breathe from my life
As we loose ourselves in this forest of beastly wonders,
And god's little creatures begin their life of dark pleasure...

Our world is magical,
Only you and me...
Our world is strange,
Only you and me...

only you and me.

Musical copyright: Michael Andrews

C-O-V-E-R SHOT!!!

2010-08-11T18:18:00.000-07:00

Great news!!
I have my first ever C-O-V-E-R shot of one of my garments..it feels awesome!!
It's for a fashion and design/art magazine based in Hong Kong called Brouhaha and its a fantastic magazine.
http://www.brouhaha.com.hk/blog/issue-6-sort-your-life-out/

Hopefully this is just the begining.. fingers crossed!!

For this i thank Jeff!!

M E A T

2010-08-11T18:09:00.000-07:00

Considering the number of responses i received from my status updates about meat, iam sure they were many who had no idea what i was doing with it. Well here it is guys...

My last project took inspiration from Peter Greenway's movie, 'The Cook, the thief, his wife and her lover'.
It wasn't hard to get inspired by such a beautifully made movie that encapsulated the grotesque side of humanity. With it's vibrant set design and costumes by none other than Gaultier, it spoke in its many layers of sexuality and decadence.
The concept was how the idea of how progression was show within the movie from barbarism to culture, raw meat to food and its celebration of the grotesque.

My use of meat was to use take forward the rawness of it and use it in a place where it displaced the viewer’s perception of fashion and how it seems to have progressed within this world of decadence and fashion. It created a situation where the viewer was not just watching but also participating with the garment on a much more personal level.

The reaction I received was anything but ordinary. People appreciating it from afar but as they came forward the stench of the (now) rotting meat took over their sense and immediately made them very aware of what was in front of them.

It was this visual imbalance that seemed to attract them and somehow the stench added more flavour and appreciation towards it (if I could say).

Cow's stomach (Tripe)

Kidney's (nyum nyum!!) :p

Couture ?!?

when i threw up in my mouth uugh..

The final piece..

Photography Jeff Hahn

Model Carlotta Casoni

Anna-mi

2010-08-09T13:54:00.000-07:00

She has given light to what was a flicker of a flame.
She has amazed the world by her virtue and her beauty,
As she caresses the wind that blows by her,
kissing her cheeks with lips that smile.

She is not a person, more so an entity,
That engulfs all emotion and brings out the celebration of life.
She has inspired and awed many,
As will her trail that she leaves behind...

She cannot be touched and her spirit untamed,
She is a spirit, my muse.
A muse so great that her her beauty lies in every motion,
The echo of her voice, captured by the forest,
unwilling to let go.

She is my muse,
For she shall be the end of me,
And the start of a new beginning.

To Anni-Mi,
My dear friend, you have given me so much and i hope that all your dreams and wishes come true!

Dance the night away!!

;) K

thursday 24th 00:48

2010-06-23T16:32:00.000-07:00

My mind wanders endlessly, i cannot begin to understand what i feel or what i touch. I remain in the doldrums of silence where time seems to be still. I cannot accept the fact that life at this point seems to be a wisp away from what it is meant to be, but then again, how do i know what is supposed to be and what is not?

There are times when surety is my best man and times likes these that make me question my existence and my life rewards. Is it all worth it?

I leave behind a trail for someone to follow and hear nothing but the winds of silence that brush away the crumbs of my very existence. How can i leave my mark for them to see, how can i cheat time and walk away with the accomplishment of doing so?

I can see the road that runs parallel to my life but somehow it never seems to entwine itself with it. As i long for the crossroads (to change my direction), the winds pushes me towards the silence and stillness that envelope my fear and make me feel an intense surge of emotions that cannot be described, which overwhelms me and brings me down to my knees.

I take a deep breathe and run as fast as i can, without looking back, quicksilver i hide from the fog of perception and run until my feet bleed.

Breathe me...breathe me...

Tuesday 6:15 p.m.

2010-03-23T11:11:00.000-07:00

Time to involve myself ..

Step-up

2010-03-05T19:29:00.000-08:00

As i left for my place after a drunken night of movie it somehow dawned upon me that i tend to take life a bit too seriously. I mean after all how serious should one take life?
I keep telling myself that i will change my habits, my undoings and my health more seriously but as many of you, i never seem to reach that point. It annoys me and frustrates me. I just cannot fathom the laziness in me to push myself forward towards how i would like to live...but then again would it be my life or am i living someone else's life?
I dream of being fit (which translates to getting into shops and not asking for the largest size!!) and healthy. I wish to eat well and to push myself forward. I feel that life is somehow compartmentalised into different levels and with each level you accomplish, you are offered new opportunities to grow like this game that i play. Does that mean that i have to surpass this level of uncertainty to find what i am looking for? The situation calls for a step up in every sense of the way. Every moment that i live through seems to be an opportunity to the next level but i somehow have been late to realise that. As i climb the stairs to my place it dawns upon me that i wasted alot of time and missed alot of opportunities. I need to push myself to achieving my goals not just in work but more so on a very personal level. I need to emotionally mature and be mature about situations that have a tendency to arrive at the doldrums. At this point i feel the need to feed my soul and caress every thought and emotion that i go through with ease and certainty. I need my step up to the next level in order for me to attain my next prize. I really do...

React to act

2010-02-28T10:09:00.000-08:00

How does one even begin with the self and the obsession of self control and self perservation? It seems to be a mix-match of involuntary actions that derive itself from unprecedented situations that make no sense and at the same time derive a solution, if not leave a pondering thought that questions one's ability to function without the pulsating rhythm of one's monotonous life.
We feel in control and wait for a reaction, but at the same time when the reaction is not what is expected the mind does strange things and creates a vacuum that we loose our selves into, beyond the LOC.
I find it hard to make sense of life most of the times. It really does take me for a whirlwind escape into my darkest thoughts of self loathe and hate but at the same time it brings reality alot closer to me and what is expected of me.
I observe, i scrutinize, i critic and then i react, but how much does our reaction actually tell us about ourselves? Are we all just pawns in the world of action and reaction. Observe Newton's third law of motion;

'To every action there is always an equal and opposite reaction'

Are we all bound by this law not only in its tangible sense but also in it's very core of untangible aspects such as emotions
Do we not love but yet yearn to be loved?
Do we not hate but still learn to accept destiny and it's ironic path to destruction? After all death is inevitable. We will be but a faded memory like the sands in the palm of our hands, forgotten and swept away with time...
I believe we can outrun destiny, not because we steer clear from it, but because we can control it! I act upon myself, my emotions, my loss, my happiness and my strength. Its just a matter of time that we all react to a situation that calls upon us to react.
I shall react, and with the flamboyance of life and it's offerings. I will go forward while the past falls behind. These are my words, my reactions to my thoughts for today and i shall wait for life to react from it.

ye-lis-tra-shun...

2010-02-10T11:43:00.000-08:00

A Dog-gone day and a friend called Aindri.

2010-02-08T14:19:00.000-08:00

...

2010-01-12T08:34:00.000-08:00

C-H-A-P-T-E-R C-L-O-S-E-D.

Karma's a bitch !!!

2010-01-11T14:19:00.001-08:00

So life's a bitch! Iam at my worst, hating the weather, missing the family and karma's seems to be biting me right in the ass ! I have always thought of myself as a mountain person as opposed to a beach person but at this point i think my dreams of living in the mountains are going to be thrown out of the window as i do with my garbage bag filled with cleanex. *sniff*

Being sick and unable to even handle everyday chores is highly annoying and to the degree where i feel the need to punch, break or snap at someone or something. I hate being sick and hate being so drained out of life while time is still ticking by and not waiting for me or anyone for that matter. I have so many things that i want to do and need to do but a small deviation like illness can be such a hindrance to one's routine.

After pondering over life, a box of cleanex and a conversation with a close friend, it dawned upon me that maybe it was karma that was hitting me right in the head. Maybe an action from my past is the result of this unwanted karma.

Being a firm believer in karma, i know that my actions of today will be the judge of tomorrow. But we have all had that moment where we have taken the stick from someone and mislead them to their misdoings in someway or the other. We are not saints nor are we of pure heart. We are as vulnerable as we were when we are born or when we die. If at all i have mislead someone then i apologise. My only reason being that I have acted solely out of being human and from not wanting to be hurt in the process. But there are times when we act out of a default, especially in relationships as i have. Some call it self preservation and some call it cowardly but how does one argue with karma and explain to it the many complexities in being human and explain that some things are done by default.

KARMA, you gotta listen to me..it was a default !! *sniff, sneeze,cough*

Salome

2010-01-07T17:53:00.000-08:00

These garments are from my final project while i was pursuing my Textile degree at NID. My project required me to develop the knit fabrics and also the fabric representation techniques.
The first garment is made entirely out of one silk string that has been looped through a technique on the flat bed knitting machine.
The second ensemble is made entirely of cotton and the fabric representation i have used is Shibori (Japanese tye-dye).
This project was based on the story of Salome and St.John the priest.Hope you enjoy it!!

Salome
O f course, Salome was beautiful. A delicate frame, covered by the palest skin, fired to life by her eyes. Once besotted, men had been known to call them many things; they were like water made for drowning, singing out their silent siren’s song. But underneath them lay no sea floor, lived no creatures, hid no treasure. There lay only a black void, that invited one deeper and deeper, in the hope of finding some firm footing. But only she knew that. And that’s why they kept coming.

Once she had hoped that someone would find within them something to hold onto, something real, but no one had.

She had hoped they would teach her things she had never known ; how to feel the blood coursing in her veins, to sense every breath that she took.She had been brought up like a thing, a doll to be cherished, and so now she was unreal, like a thing that was not alive.

She had always been dead.

Red

Salome, she sits with her lover, she takes his life with each breath, drawing it from within him, with each kiss. She overwhelms him.Relentlessly breaking down his last defences, she seems everywhere at once, quicksilver, slipping away just as he reaches out to her. And he falls deeper and deeper, further into the mist, where no sound, nothing can reach him anymore. She let him fall. She pushed him over the edge.

He sleeps there now, happy for a part of him is at least is within her, flowing through her heart.

Blue

Salome lays on her couch, almost as if out of a painting. All around her the room unfolds, for she is the centre, she must be the centre of it all. Winter’s first snow has just begun to fall, and it dances by the window that looks onto that room in silence.

Her parents have just begun to eat, silently in a dark corner overhung by velvet tapestries. So it seems that in that dark, blue room Salome is the only light, a flame burning white hot.

Made brighter still by the flashes of light that rise and fall onto her face, with every stroke of the clock.

For, she must of course be amused, and who would not find a juggler playing with knives, jest that. Especially, as she sees face mirrored, and rising and falling, rising and falling, but never receding with the tide.

Aana

2010-01-06T11:59:00.000-08:00

These are some illustrations for a project i had done. Feedback always welcome!!

Enjoy

The secret language

2010-01-05T17:32:00.000-08:00

You'd imagine to know how you came across to other people and them to you, but most recently i seemed to have misjudged that. I thought that i had made every indication to the other person that i was interested and that it was all going well, but somehow i think i did not. My flatmate who was there felt that i actually came off very stand-offish and didn't really show any interest. One can imagine the shock that i got. You begin to follow your instincts about how you should react and how one should give indications/signs but honestly, do we really know what we're doing?

In this world of complex relationships, how does one know the right signs? How do we perceive the right signals and how do we reciprocate these reactions? I thought i knew it all but i clearly seemed to have missed the point by a mile. The complexity of relationships begin with just the introduction. On almost every occasion i have lowered the decibel of my voice, i have glared into their eyes and pertained to a certain amount of physical flirtation which i find natural. It all sounds like a game plan but really, is it?
I do not plan on lowering my voice nor do i stare into their eyes looking for an answer. It all just comes naturally. One can argue to this that we are brought up in such an environment where it is the stereotypes that we mimic. But how does one make them self so aware that it seems instinctive to respond to signals in a particular fashion. I am no love guru nor am i an experienced player in the field of dating. To be honest dating is something that i dont understand especially since the rules keep changing with each continent. How does one overload such insane amounts of information and.... just to find the one you love???

Does it have to be that complex? We already have over a thousand spoken languages and let's not even get into ancient and lost languages. Is it really necessary for us to include another language that has no text, no words and no direct meaning for either party to decipher?
How about "hey, i like you...let's grab coffee."

Let's hope it work. ;)

Angelina's

2010-01-04T15:53:00.000-08:00

Since my last post was a bight too insightful i'v decided to lighten it up a bit by continuing about my holiday in Paris. If you ever do go to Paris then a trip to Angelina's is a must. It is a place filled with the umm's and aah's of each and every person that comes through it's doors.
Upon arrival we were greeted by a queue of atleast twenty couples all waiting inline to partake in this sinful activity of great palatable pleasure.

My partner in crime was the non-stop-talking-about-food childhood friend of mine, Peggy. Now Peggy needs to introduction to food, she is already well versed in the art of gormandizing and believes that people who waste food are as bad as criminals (She's going to kill me for this!!). But i love her and her passion for food is beyond just a propotionable sized plate and over the top expensive french cuisine. Her impeccable taste in food and love for bubble tea is nothing short of an amusement but more so a routine that seems to have taken it's toll on the people who want to go out to eat with her.

Anyway as we managed to squeeze ourselves into a tiny table for two, our appetite bellowed with hunger as embarrassed as we were. We ordered the traditional African hot chocolate with an assortment of Macaroons. As we waited impatiently with our stomach's hanging over our head, one couldn't help notice the beauty and splendor of the restaurant. It almost transported you to another time, a time where etiquette and modesty were the rules of engagement.
Our little bubble burst as we were greeted with these two large porcelain white mugs that were filled with chocolate as dark as night and thick as blood could be. We both said outloud, " This better be be worth all twenty four euros of it!" and as we took our first sip, our lips were sealed. Our tongues collapsed in tranquil serenity and our taste buds went in overload.

To describe the taste in words would be impossible and unimaginable, it was more so a sensation. A sensation of godly delights as if ambrosia were given to the mortals to feed on.

I shall stop now because if i go any further, my temptation to relive the moment shall drive me to sheer madness and i shall just grow fat thinking about the hot chocolate. This is no drink my friends, this is a drink fit for the gods. It is as good as it can get or even..... BETTER !!

:P slurrrrp....

Love-volution

2010-01-03T20:00:00.000-08:00

Relationships can be the most artificially induced drug of happiness and at the same time it can also be a double edged sword that we all agree to dual with. What do we look for in relationships? What is it about relationships that allow us to induce ourselves into this state of emotional dependency that make us crave for more?

Do we feel the need to share/thrust our burden upon other people's shoulder because of our inability to tackle life and its inadequacies? I do not wish to believe that we are weak and that we need to stand up on not just our two feet but someone else's. As individuals of the new millennia, we were brought up to be different. We were asked or forced to grow up much earlier than normal. How is it then that we still feel the same inadequacies that our previous generations went through?
Is this human flaw an after thought of evolution which the frail mind cannot handle or does not wish to handle?
This disposition brings forth many questions that we as human beings need not answer, but bring up every now and then.

My dating life hasn't really been on the radar but i have recently been active to a certain degree. What i saw in the other person was not just to satisfy my sexual appetite but strangely to share time (my most important valuable). The reason i share these moments with the other person is to satisfy a certain evolutionary tradition of a social clause that makes it necessary for one to belong. I am who i wish to be, not for who i am with or what that person brings out in me.

Even though i know of love and its undoings, i still ponder over the thought of playing the field. After all who would want to live the rest of their lives alone. Call me a hypocrite but can one honestly say that they can live a life withouth any risks....ESPECIALLY when it comes to the four letter word.

What do you think?

First step.

2010-01-02T07:54:00.000-08:00

So i'v taken my first step by quitting my job and it's a bit of a bittersweet moment. I enjoyed my job but i did not appreciate it, it was an inlet for money and nothing else. I have learnt alot and i am greatfull to them for sharing their experiences with me. But at this point i have realised that my decision to move ahead is a positive one.
Being the start of a new year, i'am on my way to taking back my life into my own hands and steering it clear of unnecessary consequences that occupy too much space in my life. I have no time for laziness to blanket my self esteem and my pride. And i have no time for procrastination to seep its way through my decisions.

Would i have time for love? That always seems to be the question in everyone's mind. How does one make space for love when one's life is so full of ambition and drive, do we become our worst critics and then become completely jaded while love knocks on our door?
I do wish for love and i yearn for my other half but i am not self deluded by relationships that border little over 'like' and not 'love'. I am only human and to be loved is a special feeling. Would i make space for 'love'?
Yes, i would.
Would i make space for 'like'?
Yes i would.
Will i compromise my decision to steer clear of any event that could lead to a dis-balance in my routine or promise?
I hope so... :)

Earn it !

2010-01-01T15:08:00.001-08:00

It's been a long time since i'v written about my thoughts in this blog. I wonder if it is selfish on my side to not share these moments with you as i have when the times were bad. It made me think about how we as individuals are extremely selfish unwittingly. My time in London this year has been great thanks to a bunch of friends that provide me with never ending support and happiness. Work has been great as well, so in all i would say that everything seems perfect. Well almost perfect because life can never be too perfect to complain about.
This side of happiness has made me more than complacent and pushed me to a level of utter laziness and unwilling ambition, ambition that once drove me beyond boundaries that i would have never ever even dreamt about reaching.

At this moment i work at a high end tailoring shop where i have learnt many skills. My boss is ever so kind and so are the people that i work with. The pay is satisfactory but somehow my desire to carry myself to work just seems to be underwritten by thoughts of how i deserve better, yet somehow i always seem to just go on with life and the mundane choices i have made.

Have i settled with life and its offerings or am i just enjoying the comforts of life with a behavior that one can call less than satisfactory. I believe that i am driven and i believe that i have alot more to achieve but this attitude of letting life throws things at my plate seems to have had taken over my judgement and my ability to question everything within my reach. I was blinded by friends, by work and by happiness but i now remember that the only thing that did hold me back was my inability to act on my procrastinating self that made me feel i deserved everything i was given.

I do not deserve friends, nor happiness nor do i deserve a life full of opportunities. I earn it. I work towards to it. As friendships cannot be given or received, we work towards this relationship every step of the way, as one should with life. I have to earn it.
I will earn my share of happiness and i will earn my place in the world.
No one deserves anything, they can only earn it.

Paris : dAY 4

2009-12-27T15:51:00.000-08:00

So while being in Paris, a city of picturesque beauty and design i noticed how things remained unchanged. How all the buildings looked exactly as they did 50 or a 100 odd years back. This sense of rapture overwhelmed me to capture the present. To have a piece of time in your control, in your hands seemed overtly empowering and created a new high for me.

We all believe in destiny and how we carve our path towards it but do we realise that our destiny is nothing but a consequence of the choices we make in the present. It is just a mathematical distribution of our future-self, going through these fluid trasition or finalities of a given chapter. As each chapter concludes, a new one begins.

Paris: dAY 3

2009-12-26T09:37:00.000-08:00

Paris: dAY 2

2009-12-23T09:16:00.000-08:00

My day out with peggy !!! :D

Paris : dAY 1

2009-12-22T18:27:00.000-08:00

It's 3:26 a.m. Paris time and i need to sleep to catch my train tomorrow at 3 for which i have to leave at 10 a.m due to Eurostar and its inadequacies. Oh well, here are some pictures of Paris and there's more to come.

Happy holidays !!

The view from my room.

Cat on a hot tin roof !!

2009-11-10T18:05:00.000-08:00

Will be putting up some illustrations soon... sorry for the long hiatus .

See you soon.

hAPpY :D

2009-09-29T09:17:00.000-07:00

My time in London town has been great. Found a house that iam in love with. Have good friends around me and people who inspire me. I have a gorgeous little British terrier at home and the weather has been god sent!!

So while i reminiscence about life and how good it is, take a scroll down memory lane and just enjoy life. It's worth every moment !

So when you think life is going to fast, pause for a second and come back right here to relive life as you did...

Haku Namatata y'all !!!

My friend, Anaitha

2009-09-15T09:20:00.000-07:00

The past week, a very talented actress from Bollywood came by London town. She is one of the most charismatic people i have met till date. Her charm, wit and humor immediately win people over and her confidence could break down the great wall of china. She is my childhood friend and i have seen her grow into this beautiful woman that has her head very firmly on her shoulders despite being surrounded by the vicious circle of the film fraternity.

The trip was short-lived but yet time stopped for these two friends to catch up and make ado of all that has happened since they last met.

She is a beacon of hope for this young generation of skilled and hardworking professionals that live life to the fullest and take each step with pride and great dignity.

I wish her all the best and i know, deep down that she has already made it big. After all the world would be too small a place for her and her art.

From a dear friend, your already up there !! ;)

One of her upcoming movies which i cant wait to see!!

An Unsuccessful Trip in London;

by Kelsang D Dongsar and Anaitha Nair

Our impromptu plan to Southampton was crushed by many factors;

1) Being unfit so niether of us could run fast enough to the ticket counter

2) The chinese guy at the front of the ticket line was probably gay cause he didn't fall for her charm

3) We were both really worried about spending 2 and a half hours on a bus and knowing that we might want to go 'potty'

Sad Face

Potty Face

THE END.

Do not go gentle into that good night by Dylan Thomas

2009-09-14T07:44:00.000-07:00

Do not go gentle into that good night,
Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Though wise men at their end know dark is right,
Because their words had forked no lightning they
Do not go gentle into that good night.

Good men, the last wave by, crying how bright
Their frail deeds might have danced in a green bay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Wild men who caught and sang the sun in flight,
And learn, too late, they grieved it on its way,
Do not go gentle into that good night.

Grave men, near death, who see with blinding sight
Blind eyes could blaze like meteors and be gay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

And you, my father, there on the sad height,
Curse, bless me now with your fierce tears, I pray.
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Life in the fast lane ...

2009-09-06T14:33:00.000-07:00

Upon arrival in this maddening town filled with a cacophony of un-adulterated information overload, picking myself where i last left off was a bit unnerving. Almost a bittersweet moment, going down memory lane. I remember all the trials and tribulations that came with this golden opportunity and how i had to overcome all the influx of these emotions.

I am reminded of how fast life in London is and the placebo effect it has on each of us. It takes us or atleast took me to another world where you are just another physical object. We are all within this world of confused emotions and we all place ourselves within each others grasp to hold and to lead.

The realms of reality are questioned here and henceforth brought forward to the stand. Take your pick... the red pill or blue pill.

Either-ways, whatever life you lead would be over in a flash.

HOME

2009-09-03T16:53:00.000-07:00

Its been a long hiatus since i last looked upon this page of my life. I cant begin to explain the happiness that i felt while i was at home. Though i would have loved to explain it all in detail, i accidently deleted the whole post and now i realise that words wouldn't even begin to describe the two months of absolute pandemoniac madness that i felt. I appreciate my family alot more and i thank god for letting me into a family of such selfless and unconditional love.

Enjoy your loved ones, for they are more precious than any other valuable you have and let them include you in their moments of happiness that are forever eternal and etched in her hearts.

The brothers : Kunga, Tseten and cho Sunny

Mom and bro welcome the east side !!

Pure joy..

yep...iam a mamma's boy !!

2009-07-21T00:41:00.000-07:00

One of my projects that i had worked on was co-ordinating a fashion show for NID in association with the high fashion design house Kimaya। It was my second official fashion show that i was in-charge off. It also involved the students of Fashion design and Merchandising in producing ensemble that fit with the fashion show's brief.

The concept for the fashion show was developed by Kimaya and futher conceptualised by a team headed by me.

हेय !

2009-07-20T05:38:00.000-07:00

Hey all !

Firstly i hope that all of you are having a wonderful summer. *I am !!!*
Also, i have been enjoying the comforts of home and lazyness seems to overcome all efforts to pull myself into a system of productive behaviour.

Anyway, i have some exciting things coming up for the blog and iam sure you guys wont be disappointed.

Till then, take care.

afscheidsgezegde !

hOLiDAy sEAsON !

2009-06-22T13:31:00.000-07:00

Heya !! The term is coming to an end and work is getting harder to finish. Another week left and iam off to see my family after a year !! Freakin excited !! *Apologies for the use of slang, this will be the first and last time* :)

So there's much work to be done and packing as well, as i leave you to a few images that i had taken a while back.

Enjoy and Happy Holidays !!

SIGNS.

2009-06-15T09:24:00.000-07:00

During my last conversation with a friend of mine, i realised how a simple blog can actually affect people's lives. It makes them think and realise that they are not alone. That we all actually feel the same way as everyone else does. My life in London began with anything but a bang. It was a time of self criticism and self confession. It was hard but nonetheless it has given birth to this blog. My endeavors, my likes, my dislikes, my friends, my family. It is me, an extension of me and when i look at my blog, what i see are not words, but a reflection. I can see my smile and i can see my despair.

For today i would like to share with you an amazing journey of love in the big city. The short film is called 'Signs' directed by Patrick Hughes who i feel is a pioneer in his field.

The movie shows how easy it is to get lost in the big city and how love evades us through time. It rides through depression and loneliness and yet brings out the comical depiction of life and love.

In conclusion, the beauty of this short film for me was the simplistic manner in which it was approached. The actors bring to life these simple characters that we pass by everyday and do justice to its story-line.

Here's the link http://www.patrickhughes.com.au/shorts/schweppes_signs.html

And the website of Patrick Hughes http://www.patrickhughes.com.au/shorts/

All images/movie copyright www.patrickhughes.com

Enjoy !!

B & W.

2009-06-13T04:47:00.000-07:00

A few images i had taken a week back with my Olympus Digital camera. Even though it has its limitation, i still think it gives a really nice soft focus somehow.

Holborn, 1:30 p.m.

Holborn, 1:34 p.m.

Valentine row, 2:15

Different stars...

2009-06-12T11:23:00.000-07:00

So you'd sing a lullaby to get me to sleep

So it's no surprise my eyes are never heavy
For i've not seen you in the flesh for so long
That i'm not sure we would know each other at all

Oh the weight it must be light wherever you are
And i know you don't think twice wherever you areOh the weight it must be light wherever you are
And i know you don't think twice wherever you are

So i will hum alone, too far from you
All that i say now is nothing to you
We will lie under different stars
I am where i am and you're where you are, you're where you are.

Oh the weight it must be light wherever you are
And i know you don' t think twice wherever you are
And i'd ask if you're all right wherever you are

by Trespassers William

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_L0K91fwb3M

LoVE's foOL !!

2009-06-11T15:28:00.001-07:00

Today's topic of discussion children is LOVE. (as it always seems to be!!) The whole day has been spent watching soaps filled with drama and insanely stupendous relationships that seem to overcome all barriers. Going to a wishing well and throwing in a penny is not the way to go about getting a relationship as such. I find the humor in all of this, is the superficial reality that these soaps portray which we all know , would be too much for a normal human being to accomodate mentally and emotionally. But we still feel driven to relate to such characters and their destructive obsessions with love that seems to be the driving force for all good and evil.

When i look back at these soaps, i cant help but put myself in the same situation and actually feel for the character and his love loss. I know it's crazy but then again haven't we all cried at least once during a movie that seems to turn us into weeping idiots. (I have officially lost my manhood!! yikes !!)

I keep telling my friends and myself that iam off relationships for a while and that i do not want to get involved with anyone right now, but then again there is this secret desire to be found by this person, who is perfect with imperfections. This person who i desire so much that at times it hurts to not know where this person is. I choose not to look and wonder if the other 'person' is looking. I am 24, which i feel is like 50 !! I tire easily and give up without a battle scar at this point. I see no point or rational in looking for someone who is out there, who is mine... but i know nothing of.

Am i a fool or just a grieving idiot waiting for 'life' to jump onto my bandwagon?

Anyway i leave you with a few words from this strange yet hopeful person who wishes to be loved...

We are all fools, fools in the world of love,

We cannot see beyond the shadow,

For it is not two but one.

We will always be entwined,

For destiny calls upon you for me,

Take this life, for it is yours...

And care for this heart with nothing else but love.

Art Against Knives

2009-06-09T13:05:00.000-07:00

Taking things for granted is something that we all do, very well infact. We forget to appreciate the basic necessities of life and live in this dream world of lifestyle and fortune. One such story struck a cord within me. It made me reflect on life and wonder how life works it's way around us, through us and by us. Oliver Hemsley was repeatedly stabbed in the back last year. He is now paralyzed from the neck and below. He will never be able to walk or even feed himself. He will always need assistance. He was meant to join our class this year as a student of Print Design. As students of Central Saint Martins, we were asked to design a T-shirt to raise funds for Oliver's medical treatments. My concept was to show the life that Oliver would have lead if it were not for the brutal attack on him. Being a creative soul, his mind is still as free as it was but his body has become cage for life.

Eventually all T-shirts was displayed at the exhibition. I hope that i played a part in his life as much as i could and wish him well for his new life has just started, and it seems as bright as ever. You can check some of the other artworks by local artist that were on sale as well on the website.

Website images copyright to www.artagainstknives.com

http://www.artagainstknives.com/

Fashion Illustrations...

2009-06-08T09:38:00.000-07:00

Hey all !

Well as i mentioned earlier, i had a couple of illustrations that i had recently done and was excited about putting them up, well here they are.

These are all my fashion illustrations that i had done for my projects . Any feedback would be great !

cheers!!

Tugcan's birthday bbq !!!

2009-06-06T13:27:00.000-07:00

Hey all !! Sorry for completely disappearing for two whole weeks. Works been crazy and iam seriously lacking a social life. For the times that i do manage to restraint myself from the chains of CSM, i enjoy my time with friends. The past week was my friends Tugcan's Birthday. She's an absolute sweetheart and lives in the most amazing house with a garden fit for the gods. Anyway here are some images from her birthday barbecue. Promise to put up more stuff in the coming days and have some illustrations that i cant wait to put up.

take care

life for 2 ?

2009-05-18T18:54:00.000-07:00

All my life I have wondered whether I would end up alone, devoid of love and a loved one. Insecurities seem to take over and belief is lost. It can’t be helped that in order to survive one must rely on someone else. It is a basic necessity yet the most desired.

To find that person who accepts you and takes you in, whole heartedly without looking back is a blessing to the few who have overcome their loneliness with someone.

These people elevate you to such a high pedestal that it can get dangerously egoistically high up there. They deliver love and affection with such intensity that at times; it confuses our emotions and brings forth a barrage of confrontation. It makes you complacent with life, which is a dangerous thing but at the same time, you cannot help but cherish every moment of it for the fear of loosing it and never experiencing it again.

My first relationship was hardly a relationship. It lasted between classes and tuition session and the occasional movie. It was a disaster right from the beginning with our friends proposing for both of us. (Should have seen ‘D-I-S-A-S-T-E-R’ written all over it right from the start). Well it lasted for 3 months, the magic number in my life when it comes to relationships.

My second relationship was with one of the most caring person and most vulnerable person I have met to date. She always put me ahead of her, and herself behind. I did not understand that as it I who generally take on that role. It was a new situation and it felt nice. We were together for 3 months and I had to end it. Reason’s beyond what one could hope for but it had to end.

Out of all my relationships, my last relationship seems to have had the biggest impact on my life. It broke my spirit and my confidence. It threw me into a whirlpool of anger but at the same time, I realised why I was affected by it so much. I cared so much that it hurt to even see the other person shed a tear. It made me realise how much one person can actually give up for someone else. I did not love the other person, but the intensity with which I cared for brought me to my knees. It made me realise that life couldn’t be controlled in any which way, instead we have to work with it, towards it. Amplify its outcome by the decisions we make and cherish the moments of happiness, for happiness is not something that comes out with the sun everyday. I will always be grateful to ‘D’. Life has changed and forged ahead without us, but I am glad that we had our time. No regrets and no loss.

eVoLUtiON baBy !!

2009-05-17T07:20:00.000-07:00

During my time at Uni, i was always interested in finding out how other designers from different disciplines worked and how their design process differed from mine. It intrigued me to an extent where my friend circle included mainly visual communication designers. The way they translate and give life to their ideas and characters is nothing short of being godlike.

My dearest friend Nandu who i have mentioned a million times in my blog is one such god-dess !! Her ability to visualise beyond what one can imagine shocks me and her eye for detail could put the most experienced craftsmen to shame.

One of her projects that i would like to share with you is her present project based on reviving the brand Toshiba and its electronic products. Her entire concept derives itself from evolution and how everything in life evolves, whether it be us humans, animals or even objects given birth to by the hand of man. The story plays on the tree of life which we see in the end.

Something fishy...

nyum nyum..

Watch the video which shows the storyboard of the animation which if selected will be filmed and screened on national television.

http://www.facebook.com/video/video.php?v=1097536451853&oid=74058996843

The competition is open to the students of NFTS and the outcome is decided by an online voting on

http://apps.facebook.com/opinionpolls/index.php?pid=1242308654&_fb_q=1

So if you like it, do vote to see this crazy woman do her thing on national television!!

FasHion C-u-R-e's

2009-05-09T18:26:00.000-07:00

An illustration i did for a competition. The limitations were that it had to be a line drawing,black and white and had to be inspired by London. My take on this started from the Swine flu that had the city within its grasp, but at the same time the people of London seemed too busy to even notice it or even acknowledge it.

The people in London seemed too modular and their only outlet of living out their individuality seemed to translate into their attire. The need to break free and be an individual is very apparent within the confines of this concrete jungle but what one must understand is that fashion in London is not just seen as an accessory but more so as a basic survival necessity.It uplifts our mood when we are in our darkest corners and has the power to triumph over disastrous day. It has the ability to transform the wearer into their ideal avatar. This is the power of fashion. It is treated as therapy therefore the term retail therapy, but on a more serious note, i felt the irony of fashion being a remedy for swine flu highly involving and funny at the same time.

An agreement is not expected nor do i have great expectations of winning. But on that note, 5000 pounds would be great to have...

Bombay to London !

2009-05-04T08:01:00.000-07:00

These were some photographs i had taken for a friend of mine quite some time back for her project. It was shot at Portabello market and was rainy as hell.

The styling was based on a sub-cultural class present within the markets of India, mainly Mumbai.

Styling : Ria

Model : Matilda

LoVe mE tENder !!

2009-05-02T15:19:00.000-07:00

Life has strange ways of working its course around you. It hits you at the most unlikeliest of times and wakes you up like a double espresso shot that can even make the most timid of creatures into hyper-drive duracell rabbits. It takes you back memories that you once thought would be never repeat itself but at times i guess, it does.

I would like to believe that we are all good people and that our intentions are nothing but to help each other and ourselves to a life of happiness and health. Is it not possible to live in such a world where the games are redundant and relationships are just plain and simple fun? How does one surpass the ego and cross over eternal selflessness that makes a human special?

Are we living in a world of cynicism where to love is to self regulate the doses of love we give to our partner like medication... These questions will never be answered nor do i think requires an answer.

This game of push and pull seems to tire me and the rest of the world. It takes alot out of you and makes you just seem foolish and immature to even begin to realize a future with glass doors. I realise that no matter how much you put yourself into a relationship, it holds no ground as long as the other half seems to tight to squeeze through.

Eventually i look back and have no regrets of the mistakes i have made in all my relationships. I have cherished each and every moment of it and think very highly of all of them. If it weren't for them, i wouldn't understand 'ME' as i hope i do know. These people have been special to me at one point in my life, but let me assure you that they will always hold a special place in my heart. They are very dear to me and i will always be there for them, come what may.

As i go through my pictures, i cant help but smile and cherish every moment of laughter, every moment of sadness and every moment of helplessness that brought out the human side of me. After all I am only human, it is but natural to love and be loved.

The good old days.

2009-04-28T18:38:00.000-07:00

Life really does change if you believe it to change. It is this paradoxical complex institution that seems to derive meaning from nothingness. It makes us believe in the smallest of traditions and discard the biggest of confusions. It has a harshness to it which makes one appreciate the beauty and delicate nature of our lives. It introduces meaning and gives new relationships an opportunity to grow and old bonds to grow stronger.

Me, Chandini, Hanumant, Lavu (2002)

Gaurav and me on our Convocation, 2007.

My time in NID ( The National Institute of Design) has given me something which i greatly appreciate and understand, now! It has taught me to be patient with life and appreciate not just the people around you but more so the person that you yearn to be.

No one is born perfect nor are they born with a heart of gold. It is the choices that they make that build their path to their success or failure. Failure most importantly should not be avoided, infact must be dealt with as often as possible. The most important lessons in life are learnt through failure. So don't be afraid to fail or to accept failure. To accept it, is to acknowledge it and to acknowledge it is to appreciate it and correct it.

I have failed many times, in life and in love. I cannot let it take over me, instead i let it remind me and push me forward to tread the path to my success with great clarity.

My Foundation faculty, Suresh Immanuel is a person who i cannot but help introduce to you people and those of you who do not know him are really missing out on life. His humour puts you in convulsions of despair and also brings to light his simplistic ideologies of life and how to appreciate it. His eye for detail can shock you and his teaching methods make you take a step back. He has taught the greatest of minds and his humility is nothing short of a learned monk.

I thank him for his gift and i thank him for introducing me into the world of design.

Suresh and his new students. *all ears open*

My life at this point, is moving towards an uphill climb and it is because i have put myself out there, into the huge board game called life. My family and friends are on the other side of the fence and i have to cross it.

After all, the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence isn't it...

Memories from NID...

Kapse and Aviral

Nachiket, Deepali (cranky granny), Bharani, Lavu (2006).

Aviral, Nachiket, Deepali, Me, Deepak, Bharani, Lavu, Kapse (2006).

Kape and me in our annual 'sexy' pose !!

Lavu and Kapse.

Ritu and me *don't now what she's trying to do?!?* (2002).

sUN-dAy's 'R' FuN dAY's !

2009-04-26T18:00:00.000-07:00

A perfect sunday with every little bit of sunshine that kept me going. Met Nandu for brunch and we went absolutely ballistic at Boots trying on every pair of sunglasses that we could find. Before which we paid a visit to every shop in Westfield at Shepards Bush. A dramatic entrouge of laughter followed us as did strange looks from the people around us.

Cheesy !!

The Posers.

After which i met up with Jeff and Ena at Brick lane and was pleasantly surprised by the cacophony of mixed banter that seemed to over-ride any music that came from the neighboring musicians.*who weren't that good eitherways to begin with*

My reason for visiting Brick Lane was also to photograph people for my project which is based on the rebellious youth movement and how the youth use their clothing/ attire (mainly t-shirts) to express their views and their identity. Cant say much about the project or the people photographed until the project is complete.

Below are a couple of photographs i took from my new *second-hand* Instax Mini which i absolutely L-O-V-E !!! Thank you Jeff !! :)

The absolutely gorgeous Lily !! *see you at vibe soon you party animal*

Andrew who was oh so passionate about the history of his T-shirt and what it represented.

*Go Andrew !!! woohooooo!!*

Jay who is from Mauritius and killed it with two cans of beer !! Not to mention his brazillian buddies who were very warm. *rarely ever happens in London*

And yet another Andrew from Tasmania, who i would not have guessed was a Finance advisor. *absolutely caught me by suprise!! still in shock as he mentioned he grew up in a town of only 22 residents!!

And finally, i came across this wonderful woman who had the most colourful T-shirt on but sadly forgot to ask her, her name. If you dear maam, do see this, please do leave a comment with your name.

And for all the guys who were tolerant of a bewildered tibetan searching for people to photograph and helping him out....I THANK YOU. Hopefully we shall bump into each other again....

Till later guys...

Second skin

2009-04-24T17:00:00.000-07:00

So my apologies firstly for all those of you who read my blog and have noticed the dead end that it came to a couple of days back. The reason being 'UNI'. Yes, uni has officially started and we are already drowning in work. My nights are getting shorter and the days seem numbered. Deadlines to attend too and projects to be completed. Life seems to be busy as ever.

Anyway a couple of weeks back, my entire life changed and took a round about turn as you all know. I felt the need to break out of my skin and be comfortable with who i was and who i am. My entire life, i have felt insecure about myself and my physical self. I felt the need to break free and live in the moment. The only way for me to do this was to look at myself, and i mean really 'L-O-O-K' at myself.

My issues with my weight have always made me either overweight or underweight, but never normal.(my first year at uni in india saw me loose 32 kgs in two and a half months!! *i would not recomend it*) So i felt the need to capture myself naked. *dont scroll down if your not ready to see it*

My limitations were that they had to be tastefully done and aesthetically pleasing. I refused to photoshop any part of my body except for the lighting.

Anyone who does look at these pictures with immaturity and treats this extension of myself as a joke, i sympathize with you. I do not care nor do i feel the need to justify anything to you. This is a part of me and my journey to understand myself, better! And no one can stop me...

The name game.

2009-04-20T06:30:00.000-07:00

I have always been very weary of people and especially those who i feel intimidated by. This sense of discomfort just prolongs the anxiety to overcome this juvenile yet common practice by not just me but many that i know. My changing life seems to kick me right in the balls and tells me to put myself in a situation with people that i cannot control or run away from.Doing away with my futile attempt to make friends with everyone i find interesting, i felt i strayed away from the earlier aim of my weekly project. I look back and realise that i did not know these people even after speaking to them for an hour. I did not know them and i did not appreciate them.

It was until i met this striking old lady sitting by the bus who seemed too bothered by the rain. Her silver damp hair shone when the sun hit it and the lines on her face had stories to tell. She captivated me and i felt like i knew her without her even acknowledging my presence or existence.

I mustered my courage and spoke to her, asked her about her life and also directions to the nearest tube station. She spoke with warmth and care, and brought the sun out, hiding away from the clouds. I will never meet her again nor do i know her name.

But what i do know is that i strangely and deeply care for her and that she will be a special person in my life.

Not knowing her name does not make me feel less special about her. I would rather know her as a person than a tag. She is who she is because of what she has been through and the choices she makes. Not because of her name...

If life were that simple...

2009-04-19T16:58:00.000-07:00

Life is extremely unpredictable and can never be taken for granted. We all know that, but what about the people? How unpredictable are the people in our life and how does that affect us? All this week, i could not help but view friendship as a security blanket for me to fall back on. But it then made me realise that friendship cannot be viewed as something to fall back on, because the moment we begin to fall back on things, we begin to take those things for granted.

In everyday life we see things that we brush aside and never even give it a moment of thought. The unpredictability of human nature and its emotional turmoil lead me to believe that the destruction of the human soul will be us humans ourselves. The 'games' that we play for attention and for love are all a facade of colourful mind games that we humans have developed for the self preservation of one's sanity and ego.

I try to put myself above this but its complex construction within the human ego makes it unbearably necessary. We can all believe to be good people and a social addition to the much and over populated world, but there has been a time when all of you have taken away a moment of happiness from someone who you care very dearly about. You have hurt that person, maybe unintentionally, or you may have even hurt them with the vindication of a scorned women. What i will say is that you have hurt that person because of only one thing... and that thing is your 'ego'.

The ego is the most dangerous weapon that crosses barriers even between loved ones. It surpasses all diseases and spreads like an epidemic across all countries, race and even religion.

This was when i began to realize about how the ego is directly related to the objects and the relationships we have with the people around us. How does one have a relationship where the ego is inconsequential ? *yes, my love for the word still holds strong!!*

Eventually to save my own skin, i have to trace back my steps and tread the path with alot of caution. I do not think it is right and i do not agree with it, but to prevent despair and disappointment more importantly, i have too.

If life were that simple.

" cLiCk ! "

2009-04-17T11:45:00.000-07:00

Being surrounded by people that inspire you is a sure way to success. I have many friends that inspire me and make me realise that there is so much more to achieve before one can call themselves a 'good' artist or designer. Looking at their work, it makes you appreciate their worthiness to their craft and gives you a better understanding of their line of work.In my time in London, i have come across many inspirational people who i feel push the boundaries, each in their respective fields. One of them being my friend Jeff.

His work cannot be called contemporary for there is no vagueness about it. It is precise and it is articulate. His passion to derive meaning with the sound of each 'click' puts many others to shame. His art *i refuse to call them photographs* and vision is unbound by any limitations of creative stability. Each image swallows you whole and drowns you in their stories with no hope of ever looking back. It is hard to withdraw yourself from his work and i can say for a fact, that it has influenced me and my work to a considerable amount.

If you are reading this, then it would be a shame for me to not share his art with you.

http://www.jeff-hahn.com

http://jeffhahn.blogspot.com

Below are a few images from my day.*I think iam getting better at it*

P.S. JEFF- You owe me for the number of hits!! Iam thinking pork chops and your grandma's salad...

There is beauty in breakdown...

2009-04-16T12:28:00.000-07:00

At this point it seems pretty uneventful, a day that is spent with no motivation or adventure to involve yourself with. It wasn't a bad day but more so a day that seemed to be the extension of yesterday's day of leisure .*i have realised how much the lack of sun can actually affect me and my mood*

I find it hard to pin point this feeling of helplessness where we are just complacent. I have much to achieve and at this point it seems cruel to waste a day without any creative or constructive output.

It annoys me that time cannot be bottled and put away to keep, which is why i probably crave it so much. Time to me is like a drug and when i do not have it, it gets me irritated to my highest degree.

The day was also spent scanning potential individuals that i thought i could include in my blog. My interest in portraiture drives me to understand the complexities of 'framing'.

Old city, Ahmedabad '04

Bond street 15th April '09

I have realised that my interest in people is beyond just making friends. I think it derives itself from my views on this dynamic yet ostentatious relationship between individuals that put themselves and their heart at risk for a partner who they hope will fill this void within them. But this is where i cannot help but question, wasn't man made to be self sufficient? If so then why do we feel the need to surround ourselves with pillars of strength that if taken away, can bring us down like a house of cards.

I know that my journey in this life will not be as simple and smooth sailing as one would hope for *do not like hope!!* but then again, aren't the misgivings of life the beauty of being human? As Frou Frou, one of the musical talents that i hold in high regard sang in their hit song 'Let go', the chorus say's it all.

"So let go, let go, jump in...

oh well, whatcha waiting for...
it's alright,

'cause there's beauty in the breakdown"

Coffee, tea and friends for me!

2009-04-15T12:23:00.000-07:00

The day has been good and sunny, a rare sight in the city of life. It brought with it clouds of terror that would occasionally let out a rumble of disagreement with the sun. A day of leisure and coffee with conversations that never seemed to end. My day was spent catching up with Nandita and Jeff. We were graced with Tom (Nandita's batch-mate) and Ena's presence as well for just a brief moment before which Ria popped by to bring in news of despair. (i hope she found what she was looking for)

Of the many things that i have decided to push myself towards, is to pursue my dream of becoming a *decent* photographer. I wish to be known not just for my work in the fashion industry but more so as an artist, a collaborator of many fields that is bound by no limitation. I see no reason as to why fashion designers should be bound by just the ooh's and aah's of the rich and famous. Fashion should be an art that is reachable by all means to anyone who desires to pursue and understand this beautiful language that is intertwined with history dating from the Egyptians right down to the more recent Mughal empire.

Other than that, it was an absolutely beautiful day that involved my friends and doing what friends do best, talk.

Tom and Nandita

Jeff

Some of my life drawings.

till later guys.

Friendly Society !!!

2009-04-14T09:10:00.000-07:00

Being in London, i haven't really seen as much as i would like to believe so. The doors of oppurtunity in London is immense. The number of museums, in particular the British Museum is vast and needs atleast a week to completely do justice to it. The life of a student in london is a far cry from luxury and good meals. If one can barely scrape through a month on a budget of 500 pounds, then consider yourself lucky and a miser.

The life of a student in london is at times highly exhilarating and treacherous for those who do not know that cider can make you fall in love with concrete.*i have seen a plentiful of men and women fall straight on their face*. It brings with it many oppurtunities to expose yourself to the mass subcultural epidemic that seems to have taken over London. It grips you, and puts you in a state of shock where you feel a lack of identity (atleast i did).

The Mods, the punks, the goths and the lesbian and gay community, just out of the few that i have seen.

London was always known as the city of lights and bars, especially Soho for

its dangerously precarious night life. One has to admit that the atmosphere in Soho is electric. The streets are filled with life and not just gay people, in-fact i would rather say that the number of straight couples at one point could give stiff competition to the gay community.

A friend of mine, the ever so beautiful Nadia promised to take me to this pub which she said would be an experience like never before. It was called Friendly Society.

It's located in the heart of Soho, right next to 'The Village' (hard to miss with the go-go dancers swinging their tush in every possible angle). It is highly discreet and does not advertise itself unlike the other bars which remind you of a blimp on steroids.

As you walk down into the basement, the bombardment of its eclectic music hits you like a sour lemon and takes some getting used too. But the moment you walk in, the warmth of its interiors and its quirky decor is nothing short from a page of Alice in Wonderland. Its ceilings completely decorated with barbie's and ken's and as you move in towards the bar, a flashback of your childhood toy is unmistakable, the Troll Dolls !

The staff of Friendly Society is possibly the most warmest staff members i have ever encountered. The manager, Graeme who is from australia is a delight to talk too, provided he isn't to busy. But even if they are, they always make an effort to know you, not as a customer but as a person.

He does like the warmth of our buttocks on his head.

I will visit them again, as i have done before and if anyone is interested in experiencing this strange but quirky little bar, come along. Email me at kelsangdorjee@gmail.com and we'll try to accomodate as many as possible.

later guys.

Macleodgunj- The Invisible Fence.

2009-04-13T04:43:00.000-07:00

Well its been a bright sunny day and positive thoughts is where i put my mind to rest. I cant help but look back at my entries and notice how sad and depressed i made myself to be (not that i wasn't). But from today, my logic is simple. Surround yourself with happy thoughts and happy people and it should make you happy right ?!? Well its worth a shot and i have nothing to lose but Time, which either-ways seems to run without any care for me. So i say to all of you, jump on board and give it a shot !

Today i reflect on my most favourit-est *if i could make it sound any more gay* vacation. It started as a punishment by my *beloved* mother who sent me to re-live my roots as a tibetan living in exile. To learn my language and to educate myself about the status of Tibet and its government in exile. Never in a million years did i ever expect to fall in love with this place. It literally took my breathe away and my heart in an instance.

There will be places that change you and there will be places that uplift you, but more than anything else there will be places that open up a whole new world that make you realise how small a dot you are in this world.

This journey of mine was a starting point in my new life, now that i look back on it. It showed me how unpredictable life is and how we meet the most amazing people in the unlikeliest of situations.

Firstly i have to thank Russel Peters, for bringing us all together.*Amen*

Without him i dont think i would have met any of my fellow friends who i shall now describe to you all, one by one.

We were called The Invisible Fence, because no one would understand us except for us five and none other could be a part of us, because we were extremely happy with what we had !

The Invisible Fence.

Liz, Nandita, Dayel, Me and Tenzin.

Nandita (The Spaztic)

She is retarted !! She just is. Those of you who know her, know exactly what iam talking about. *iam laughing while iam typing this* She is amazingly funny and eccentric which is why i love her. She can make a boring talk into the most vibrant and dynamic conversation you will ever have in your life. An amazing animator with a vision unlike any i have ever seen.

Dayel (The Inquisitive Englishmen)

Dayel is by far, the most exuberant person i have met till date. His eating habits are minimal besides the occasional cheese sandwhich which he literally devours in a matter of seconds (i'd say 15 sec flat, now thats fast). His humor borders vulgarity to the brim and always is full of life ! His talents are more than just making a kick ass mojito and his personality just draws you in closer.

Liz ( Crazy Canadian)

This woman you do not want to mess with! She plays rugby on her university's team and will beat you to the summit of Mt. Kilimanjaro. As tough as she is on the outside, she is as soft and sweet in the inside (that sounds really wrong!!). She has the tolerance level of a saint and i cannot imagine meeting anyone else like her ! She is my own and my only 'LIZ'.

Tenzin (Gingered haired racist) hahahahahaha..

OK, so the deal with Tenzin is that he actually is Australian. He is 'Ginger'! And he has a tibetan name because his parents are in love with Tibet (so is he). He will H-A-T-E you if you like Nescafe and he will love you if you feed his black hole of an appetite. He is an amazing gymnast and wants to open a proper 'coffee' selling shop where the word 'Barista' can actually be worn with pride!

These below are just a few moments that i feel i can share with you, the others are mine to keep. :) enjoy !!

Nandita (Nandu) was meant to do this (above).

Instead...

.. she did this...

and this..

... and finally, this !! (grace of a swan you'd think)

Nandu, dayel and me at Carpe Dium. Our home away from home.

neee-gaaaaaaaaaahhhh !!!!!!

Nandu pointing and grinning at the

Kohinoor condom we found on the road

Our own La HORE !! Liz

Do not ask... just look !

Ecstatically happy.

Let's try and get a normal picture of all of us..

Goddamitt !! i said normal !!

Ok, lets try again ... n-o-r-m-a-l !!

During our time in Macleodgunj, we

painted a mural on the wall of a restaurant

that we use to frequent alot called

Carpe Dium. *which meant 'Seize the day'*

The finished mural.

Me, Dayel and Nandu.

Our sign off's.

Well it has taken me 4hrs to get this blog up. Hope you guys enjoyed this journey with me and remember that life is actually, very short. So look back, think and then realise how amazing it is to be alive and have people who want to share their life's journey with you.

God i sound really gay... *nodding head*

later until more...

Oh brother where art thou ?!?

2009-04-12T09:23:00.000-07:00

After a nervous breakdown last night where i questioned everything within me and the choices i have made, i came to a conclusion that i never quiet expected. I have realised how important family is to me. I have realised how crucial it is to have good communication with your elders and i have also realised that life dosen't always work the way you want it too.

I dont speak much about my family to my friends or others because i feel it is a subject to private to discuss. Family to me is something that will always protect you, and will always oversee the choices you make but will not stop you from making mistakes. It is this intense connection that is unexplainable. The smallest of arguments seem to change the world around you and the smallest of compliments seem to push you to the stars and beyond. I know some of you would not agree with me on this.

It isn't like my family hasn't been through hardship. Every family has their problems, its just how the members of the family work together to overcome their difficulties that make them triumphant. There are alot of compromises one has to make and with that responsibilites to take.

Me, Mom, Dad and dad's friend.

We live in a world where problems are many and solutions are very few. As a designer myself, we are meant to be problem solvers. But how do we solve the problem when the problem is 'us'.

My brother is a beacon of hope for me. He took over as the man of the house as soon as he got done with college. His personality draws people towards him like a moth to a flame. He balances life exceedingly well and never gives up his principles for anyone or anything. I admire him and i am scared of him as well (no matter how much i hate to admit it). His words can put me in a whirlpool of anger and at the same time, his support puts concrete to shame.

I dedicate todays blog to him, my brother..Tseten..the fuker !! *i know he's gonna kill me for this, yikes!!*

My brother telling my mom that her younger son has lost it.

The cuter one ?? *say right!! say right!!*

Aint nothing gonna break my stride...i gotta keep on moving !!

2009-04-11T06:51:00.000-07:00

Its still raining and somehow my mood dosen't really seem to be getting anywhere. A day that started with rejection from the bank (because they find it amusing that students always leave things for the last minute so... 'let's punish them !!'). I hardly find it amusing instead sympathize with their lack of humanity and myself.

I remind myself of the questions that one should ask before judging others, after all i am no saint.

I ponder over how my life seems to have taken a 180 degree turn and i seem to have lost judgement of things, good or bad.

Times were good a couple of weeks back. Life hardly seemed abysmal.

Nothing like a good day of sunshine in the park with company that is easy to fall back on.

Jeff and me at green park

Anna

Jeff

My hunger takes me to believe that they would taste good.

Mmm...pigeon tikka !!

Anyway, let's hope i find my grounding soon. *fingers crossed*

Thought i'd put some of my older work. These are from my time with Ashish N Soni, one of India's leading and groundbreaking designers (in my opinion). These were showcased at the New York Olympus Fashion Week '07.

All images copyright Ashish N Soni / ELLE.com

Rainy days keep comin my way !!

2009-04-10T12:04:00.000-07:00

I am now officially broke and the past couple of days haven't really been very kind to me. Its strange though how being in an unlikely situation makes you think

differently and also somehow puts you (unwittingly) in the spotlight where there are none to watch. It feels like an empty theatre where the drama of your life seems to unfold and there are none to appreciate it.

My thoughts on life at the moment seem to just splinter away like the friendships based on the social structuralistic way of society, inconsequential!! *a word that i'v begun

to love*

My closest friend (of which i have a select few), Gaurav called and explained to me why i need to stick to my guns. He is one of the reasons why i'am here and he is unbelievably talented !! Though his luck with women seem to be his downfall... He inspires me..he really does..which is why i think i really appreciate him and cant help but put him on a pedestal. He is someone who i cannot bear to be apart from, yet his " i will call you" which he now does, always seem to uplift me in the worst of moods(even though he dosent at times).

J-A-C-K A-S-S !!

Gaurav 'the jackass' !!

Anyway, these are a couple of pictures from my day.

Day 1 Post 1

2009-04-09T17:54:00.000-07:00

This is first time that i have ever posted anything related to my life. I have every intention to make this run as long as i can and make it interesting for my other *fellow* bloggers. Its a new step for me and i plan on running it all the way long ! So here goes...

iT's oPeN

Unrequited love

cupid strikes again.. MISFIRE!!!!!

cupid strikes again.. MISFIRE!!!!!

To the left...

politely incorrect.

New Section!!!- Naughty Nachee

Stop attitud-ing me...

bzzz.

Happy birthday to me!

Lil ole' me!!

INSPIRE...

Life

Maria Lani

DONE.

tea party and a bad poem

long, gone and moved on...

dandies...

tick tock..

Conversations with a father...

a day in the life of the unwell

...

mIm

MONEY

*_*

C-O-V-E-R SHOT!!!

M E A T

Anna-mi

thursday 24th 00:48

Tuesday 6:15 p.m.

Step-up

React to act

ye-lis-tra-shun...

A Dog-gone day and a friend called Aindri.

...

Karma's a bitch !!!

Salome

Aana

The secret language

Angelina's

Love-volution

First step.

Earn it !

Paris : dAY 4

Paris: dAY 3

Paris: dAY 2

Paris : dAY 1

Cat on a hot tin roof !!

hAPpY :D

My friend, Anaitha

Do not go gentle into that good night by Dylan Thomas

Life in the fast lane ...

HOME

हेय !

hOLiDAy sEAsON !

SIGNS.

B & W.

Different stars...

LoVE's foOL !!

Art Against Knives

Fashion Illustrations...

Tugcan's birthday bbq !!!

life for 2 ?

eVoLUtiON baBy !!

FasHion C-u-R-e's

Bombay to London !

LoVe mE tENder !!

The good old days.

sUN-dAy's 'R' FuN dAY's !

Second skin

The name game.

If life were that simple...

" cLiCk ! "

There is beauty in breakdown...

Coffee, tea and friends for me!

Friendly Society !!!

Macleodgunj- The Invisible Fence.

Oh brother where art thou ?!?

Aint nothing gonna break my stride...i gotta keep on moving !!

Rainy days keep comin my way !!

_